Hi, I’m Cortney.

My guess is if you’re reading this, you already know me and I gave you the link. However, on the occasion that you a brand new friend (hi, new friend!) let me tell you a little about myself.

As a nod to the early 2000’s when surveys ‘about me’ were all the rage, I answered some fun questions to help you get to know me. You do not have to send this survey to any of your friends, though.

How can someone tell when you’re having a bad day?

I’ll be a little more pessimistic, quiet and stick to myself until I can figure out what’s going on.

Are you creative?

I have bouts of creativity for sure. Often when it hits, it feels like a tsunami of ideas so I keep a running list to help me when the creativity well runs dry.

Would you prefer to live in a big city or a farm?

I love the farm life-I grew up playing in the woods making forts and catching tadpoles. I still enjoy the idea of fishing and hiking. My heart needs to see the greens of a forest and the quiet loudness of nature (seriously, it’s LOUD in nature, yet we somehow always envision it’s so still-not the case). However, with all this said, if you told me I had to pick one-it would be a big city.

Are you a neat or messy person?

I’m a neat person with messy tendencies? I enjoy neatness, I like to clean (except dishes, trash, and the liter box) but I have a natural predisposition to get messy. I’m like Pig Pen in some ways that no matter where I am I usually have my ‘stuff’ around me. I don’t know that that is, but I’ve just accepted it over the years? My desk at work can get  uber chaotic but I do try to clean it off/straighten it before I go home every night.

 What are two things you’re really good at?

I’m really good at caring about people and estimating time. The time thing only works when I have a timer set though, don’t ask me how old I am or when in the past something happened-I future oriented, folks! Seriously though, I usually only set a timer to ensure I don’t get distracted (oh! I’m good at that too!) but I usually know how long 10 minutes is…but I really don’t remember how old I am.

What are three things you’d want if you were stranded on an island?

So my first thought would be my cats because they’d hunt for me or my husband because he’s smart and could probably get us rescued but at the same time…I don’t want to see my loved ones suffer so, they can just man the search party.  How about something sharp, a tarp, and a book about indigenous species to the island. (a cell phone, a well stocked hut, and a boat were just too easy.)

What was you favorite subject in school?

I liked school, period. Science, literature, and music courses were always my strong points. Math was until I had the misfortune of some not-so-great teachers. Music, specifically orchestra for 7 years, kept me alive. (Because I was in music courses, I didn’t get to take many art classes, that always bummed me out.)

Do you curse a lot?

Yep. I don’t curse at work (#profesh) or much around my elders (#respect?) but anyone/anywhere else, yep. There’s science now that says this means I’m super intelligent and very in tune with my feelings! Oh! And cursing has actually been shown to alleviate physical pain! I’m just saying, cursing is effing bad ace.

How long does it take you to get ready in the morning?

On a typical morning this is my routine: I get up at 7:40, or try to and my cat comes in and demands snuggles so I snooze until 7:50(ish). Hair washing days I take a shower, brush my teeth, get dressed, spend two minutes blow drying my hair (a job that can take 30 minutes usually), grab whatever I need for the day, and leave by 8:20. I don’t wear make up every day and my work environment is pretty laid back. If I do want to wear makeup, I’ll do it during my lunch or morning break at work (usually this takes about 5 minutes). Sleep will always prevail here.

What always cheers you up when you’re down?

My cats, my friends, my husband, crying.

Do you floss?

I do! I have a friend who is has a doctorate in nutritional science that once told me about the connection between flossing and gut health and that made me ensure that I was flossin’.

If you had a giraffe that you needed to hide, where would you hide it?

Fun story, I lived in South Africa for a while in grad school teaching kiddos. One day while I was instructing a giraffe walked by the window and I just stopped talking and just watched the giraffe. The kids were like “NBD lady, that happens all the time” but giraffes are ginormous and I still can’t fathom them just walking about (the school did butt up to a nature preserve). So where would I hide a giraffe? THERE IS NO HIDING A GIRAFFE!

What’s the most embarrassing story from your childhood

My biological grandmother died when I was very young and my grandpa remarried a very awesome lady who accepted me as her own. Her whole family did. One day we were at my grandma’s daughter’s house (my new aunt) and we were having spaghetti for dinner. I was nervous because a) I wanted to be accepted by my new family and b) she had a very nice house. My new aunt gave me my plate of spaghetti and garlic bread and told me to go sit on the patio with everyone but in order to do that I had to walk across the white carpet in the living room. “Use two hands!” got it. I can do this. No spaghetti on the white carpet. All was dandy until I got to the sliding door that I thought was open but actually had the screen pulled across. I tried to walk though (I was REALLY FOCUSED on my plate!) and my plate landed on the screen door and made its’ way down to…yep…the white carpet. Ope.

Is there one color that you seem to really like in your closet?

Mustard yellow, grey, chambray.

Do you collect anything?

Not so much anymore. Art work, memories, plants.

What’s your philosophy in life?

Don’t be an asshole. Literally, that’s it. It’s a litmus test for anything in life, “will doing/saying or not doing/saying X make me appear to be an asshole to anyone?” Works on small or large scales, brings awareness to one’s self. Feel free to borrow.

I like to think I’m a pretty open book-so if I didn’t cover something, please feel free to ask!

Here’s to the journey!